Poole, UK (April 1, 2012) /IPM News via aPRilfoolSMITH/ — Merlin Entertainments Group, Europe’s leading and the world’s second largest visitor attraction operator, is pleased to have declared unconditional today its takeover offer for the nation-state of Sprotsolovlia, through its subsidiary Merlin Entertainments (Sprotsolovlia) Pty Limited.
This acquisition will accelerate the development of Merlin Entertainments Group’s Eurasian operations and builds on its international expansion strategy, based on the roll out of its iconic global attraction brands.
Timud Hedcass, former Prime Minister of Sprotsolovlia and new General Manager of the newly branded Merlin Universe Sprotsolovlia remarked, “I am very thankful to Merlin for purchasing my country. The €472 they paid will allow me to complete business with Orange and have my cellular service reinstated.”
Merlin Universe Sprotsolovlia will be the company’s first mutli-brand resort in Europe, offering multiple Merlin-themed attractions for a single admission price, to be announced closer to opening. Highlights at Merlin Universe Sprotsolovlia include:
- The Rainbow Tunnel, newly repainted with 3D effects, commemorating the Honeydew Revolution of 1962 that led to the overthrow of dictator Vludimer Peenyshmek. Actual Sprotsolovlia citizens will be put to good work standing in the tunnel and waving.
- LEGO Sprotsolovlia Village, featuring authentic life size LEGO figures doing everything real Sprotsolovlians do, such as eating, sleeping, and taking out the trash.
- The Sprotsolovlian Dungeon, which will receive a new elevator that’s even less reliable.
- Madame Tussaud’s Sprotsolovlian Experience, where visitors will be able to pose with their favorite Sprotsolovlian heroes and celebrities, such as Ankee Duudel, leader of the Honeydew Revolution, pop star Voz Ludsky, and tennis great Serena Williams.
- The 2m long aquarium tank in the Minister of Agriculture’s office will find new additions – a starfish and a seahorse – and will be rebranded SEA LIFE Sprotsolovlia Aquarium.
- Following the Great Swine Train Incident of 1978, all forms of rail transit in Sprotsolovlia have been outlawed. To work around existing laws, Merlin, in conjunction with Simworx, Hettema Associates, and Beam’s Seatbelts, will be converting the existing 5,000 seat Grand Sprotsolovlia Opera House into the Merlin 5D Coaster Adventure. Guests will experience the top coasters at Alton Towers Resort, Thorpe Park, Chessington World of Adventures, Gardaland Resort, and Heide Park Resort, complete with waiting in queues, and driving and flying times in this 19-hour long adventure.
- The Sprotsolovlia Eye, at 136m high, will be the world’s tallest cantilevered observation wheel. From the top, guests will be able to see the two countries that border Sprotsolovlia – Afghanistan and France.
In addition, the resort will feature a Honeydew Revolution themed resort hotel and waterpark.
Nick Varney, Chief Executive of Merlin Entertainments, said: “Merlin Universe Sprotsolovlia is one of the most exciting and important projects Merlin has ever developed. Having spent some time here over the last few months I have witnessed the hard work and enthusiasm of everyone who lives in Sprotsolovlia, and I know the team here is as proud of what has been achieved as I am. It will be quite a stunning Resort – beautiful, exotic, colourful and above all fun! I have no doubt that visitors are going to be knocked out by what they see – I know I am!“